Benefits to Kids of Divorced Parents
When most people think of divorce, they consider how hard it is on the children. A divorce will cause a lot of stress and anxiousness with the kids, just as it does with the adults. In an ideal world, you and your spouse would be happy, as this is the best thing for kids. However, that is not a reality for everyone. Divorce is common, and often the divorcing couple will have children. As rough as it can be, there could be some benefits to kids of divorced parents.
This is not something that most people consider when getting a divorce, but they are worth noting. One of the first benefits is that the kids will be in healthier environments that could cause less stress. Most couples that are getting divorced have been having problems, often for years. The kids in these households will sense these problems and it can affect them in a host of ways. As stressful as the divorce can be for everyone, it will mean that the kids will not have to see their parents fighting and arguing, or ignoring one another, every day.
In addition, some benefits are more kid-specific. These are benefits that can affect the day-to-day lives and happiness of the children.
More Vacations
When parents are divorced, it often means that the kids will have more vacations. They will be able to head out of town with each of the parents separately to take a road trip, visit an amusement park, go camping, etc. If the parents still lived in the same house, it’s highly unlikely that there would be the opportunity to go on more vacations.
Focused Parenting
One of the other benefits is that divorce tends to cause more focused parenting. Because the parents do not have their children with them all of the time, they are often more focused on the kids when they are there. You want to give the kids 100% of your time when they are with you, and that’s great. It’s good for the kids to have their parents even more invested in their lives and happiness.
Better Times and More Fun
As mentioned, when a couple that isn’t getting along is living in the same household, it causes stress. When that goes away, it allows for more joy and happiness in both of the households. It leads to more birthday parties, more holiday celebrations, and more time enjoying hobbies together and playing games. It can help to provide the kids with more fun in their life. While this might seem like a small thing, it’s huge. Kids should be happy. Just because you and their other parent are no longer together doesn’t negate happiness.
Since there are two of you working toward your child’s happiness in two households, it has the potential to double the fun. This is because the parents are no longer stressed about one another. It allows the parents to be the happiest and truest versions of themselves as possible, which is good for the kids to see.
Easier to Understand the Rules
Often, parents do not agree on the way to run their house or to discipline the children. When the parents are together and in the same household, this can be difficult for the kids because they may not always know the rules. They could go to one parent and get one answer and then get the opposite answer from the other parent. This is confusing for the kids.
However, when the parents are divorced, they will have their own rules and will run their home the way they want. The kids will understand the variances when they are at each house. It’s a lot easier on them. It also means that there isn’t the stress of the parents contradicting one another all the time.
Although the best option would be to have two parents in one household who love one another and their children, and who are always on the same page, it’s not realistic. Divorce happens to many families. Often, it’s better to have two parents who are not together, but who are happy, than to be in the same house and to be miserable. As you can see, even though it can be rough on the kids, there are some benefits to be had.
Divorce is Still Hard
Even though there are the benefits mentioned above, it doesn’t mean that divorce and co-parenting are easy. The adults may have trouble communicating with one another, or they could be other conflicts that occur. Parents need to find ways to work together to do what’s best for the children.
You should always try to look toward the positive when you are going through a divorce, including when it comes to the benefits that your kids can experience when they get to live in two homes. Take some time to think about other benefits that the kids might experience. You may find that talking with them about those benefits when they are feeling sad or down can help them.
Once the divorce is final and things start to settle down between the households, it becomes easier for them. It doesn’t mean that they haven’t gone through trauma — you all have. However, it does mean that things will start to get better. They will get into a routine and they will still feel safe and loved. You might also want to consider getting counseling for your children when you are going through a divorce. This can help them to process their emotions.
Because divorce can be so hard to go through, you mustn’t try to do it on your own. The best thing you can do when you know you will be going through a divorce is to get in touch with a family law attorney in Scottsdale. Find an attorney that has experience with these cases and talk with them. They can help you to make more sense of what’s happening with your divorce from the beginning through to the end.